Emotional Management and Upekkhā

本週重點

Overview

💬 English Goal

英文目標

Use descriptive adjectives for feelings (overwhelmed, calm, stressed) and action verbs for managing them (accept, let go, observe). Master the patterns “I can control…” and “I cannot control…”, plus “It is better to…”

🪷 Spiritual Goal

佛學／心靈目標

Understand Upekkhā (equanimity, 捨心) as a balanced heart that is not controlled by strong emotion. Practice Right Action and Right Speech by focusing energy inside the Circle of Control — and meet every feeling with non-judgmental observation.

單字 Vocabulary

點 🔊 聽發音

聽、跟著念、大聲說三次。

equanimity(n.)	平靜／平等心
detachment(n.)	超然／不執著
attitude(n.)	態度
overwhelmed(adj.)	不知所措的／被淹沒的
calm(adj.)	平靜的
accept(v.)	接受
let go(v.)	放下／放手
observe(v.)	觀察

句型 Sentence Patterns

Key Patterns

Pattern 1 · What I can control

I can control my ___.

I can control my attitude.

I can control my words and my actions.

Pattern 2 · What I cannot control

I cannot control ___.

I cannot control the weather.

I cannot control other people’s feelings, so I let go.

Pattern 3 · Choosing the wiser response

It is better to ___.

It is better to observe my anger than to act on it.

When I feel overwhelmed, it is better to breathe and accept.

✏️ Grammar Focus · can / cannot for ability and choice

We use can and cannot (can’t) with the base verb to say what is — and is not — in our power. I can control my actions. · I cannot control the past. The verb never changes for he / she / it: She can let go. Notice that let go stays as two words: I let go of my worry.

故事 The Story

Story

One day a student came to a teacher, upset. “Someone was rude to me,” she said, “and now I feel angry all day.” The teacher pointed to a still pond. “Throw a stone in,” he said. The student did, and the water churned and rippled.

“Now make the ripples stop with your hands,” the teacher said. The student splashed and pushed, but the water only grew wilder. So she stopped and waited. Slowly, on its own, the pond became calm and clear again.

“Your feelings are the ripples,” the teacher said. “You cannot control whether the stone is thrown — but you do not have to splash. Observe, accept, and let go, and your heart returns to stillness.” This balanced, unshaken heart is Upekkhā — equanimity. We cannot control every stone, but we can always control our attitude, our words, and our actions: our Circle of Control.

🤔 Check your understanding

What do the ripples in the pond stand for? 池塘的漣漪代表什麼？
Why did splashing make the water worse? 為什麼用力撥水反而更亂？
Name one thing inside your Circle of Control today. 說出今天你「控制圈」裡的一件事。

佛法小品 The Principle

Principle

Imagine your mind is a quiet pond. A big feeling drops in like a stone, and the water ripples. With equanimity, you simply watch the ripples until the water grows still again.

🌟 The Circle of Control 控制圈

Equanimity is not coldness, and it is not pretending we have no feelings. It is the calm, balanced heart that observes a feeling without being swept away. We cannot control the weather, the past, or another person’s mood — and worrying about those things only makes the water wilder. But we can always control three things: our attitude, our words, and our actions. When we pour our effort into that small circle and let go of the rest, peace follows.

練習 Practice

Homework

Each day this week, write about one stressful moment. Sort it into what you can control and what you must let go of. 每天記錄一個壓力情境，分成「可控」與「放手」兩部分。

Beginner 入門

3 short sentences

Ages 5–8 · new learners

Write a situation (simple past), one “I can control…” sentence, and one “I cannot control…” sentence.

ExampleMy friend was angry at me. I can control my words. I cannot control my friend’s feelings.

Intermediate 中級

Strategy & attitude

Ages 9–12 · developing fluency

Describe a stressful situation. Write 2 “I can control…” sentences about your attitude and actions, then 1 sentence saying why you let go.

ExampleI felt stressed because I failed the math test. I can control my attitude to stay positive. I will study harder next time. I cannot control the past, so I let go of my worry.

Advanced 進階

Upekkhā synthesis

Ages 13–16 · fluent speakers

Analyze a complex situation involving others. In 3–4 sentences use observe, accept, detach to explain how you controlled your own reaction, then add a reflection.

ExampleI observed my frustration, but I chose to accept the reality (Upekkhā). My words were encouraging instead of critical. Focusing on my own effort made the situation less stressful.

小考 Mini Quiz

Check Yourself

選出最適合的答案，點選後會看到解析。

Question 1 of 10

Which word means “平等心 / a calm, balanced heart”?

Correct: C. Equanimity (平等心／捨心, Upekkhā) is the calm, balanced heart. Overwhelmed and stressed are difficult feelings.

Question 2 of 10

Complete the pattern: “I ___ control my attitude.”

Correct: A. Your attitude is inside your Circle of Control, so we say “I can control my attitude.”

Question 3 of 10

Which is something you cannot control?

Correct: D. The weather is outside the Circle of Control. Your attitude, words, and actions are the three things you can control.

Question 4 of 10

In the pond story, the ripples stand for our…

Correct: B. The ripples are our strong feelings. We watch them settle instead of splashing and making them worse.

Question 5 of 10

Why did splashing the water make the pond worse?

Correct: A. Struggling against a feeling only stirs it up. Equanimity means we observe and let the water settle on its own.

Question 6 of 10

What are the three things in your Circle of Control?

Correct: C. We can always control our attitude, words, and actions — and pouring our energy there brings peace.

Question 7 of 10

Which word means “觀察 / to watch a feeling without judging it”?

Correct: B. To observe (觀察) is to watch a feeling without judging it — the heart of mindfulness and Upekkhā.

Question 8 of 10

Which sentence correctly uses “It is better to…”?

Correct: D. The pattern is “It is better to + (base verb).” → It is better to observe my anger.

Question 9 of 10

Someone is rude to you. Which is the Upekkhā response?

Correct: B. Equanimity is not coldness. We observe the feeling, accept it, and still choose Right Speech and Right Action.

Question 10 of 10

What does “let go” mean in this lesson?

Correct: C. To let go (放下) is to release worry about what is outside your Circle of Control, so your energy stays on what you can change.

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